Characters

The owner and proprietor of Lucky Rabbit Investigations, Hardy is a detective with a big heart and an even bigger deluded sense of his own skill level.

With close to a hundred investigations under his belt this cooler-than-thou hardboiled hare spends his nights solving the unsolvable, doing the impossible, and trying to make sure everyone knows how great he is all at the same time.

Likes: Solving Mysteries, fame, fortune, & a nice vest
Dislikes: Dimwits, Predators, Inactivity
Favorite Food: Ruffage
Favorite Drink: Carrot Juice and Gin
Goal in Life: Out-Sherlock Sherlock
Good Point: Cool under pressure
Bad Point: Show-Off
Hobbies: Basketball (great hops), being hardboiled in speakeasies, reading Duck Twacy comics

A tough cookie with a short fuse and the muscle to back it up, at his heart Ham is a sweetheart who just wants to be friends and do what’s right. Of course, that’s tough to reconcile with him punching you in your snoot when you call his sweater ‘a little small.’ Hired by Hardy (who he reverently calls “Boss”) as personal bodyguard, he’s also Lucky Rabbit Investigation’s driver – owning an old busted up taxi cab he fixed up which he affectionately calls “Ol’ Aggie”, and WOE BE UNTO WHOEVER SPEAKS ILL OF IT.

Likes: Beating up jerks, driving Aggie around town to show off, eating heaps of slop
Dislikes: Know-it-alls (except the Boss), JERKS
Favorite Food: Slop, the grosser the better
Favorite Drink: Spoiled White Russian
Goal in Life: Be the strongest guy on the block
Good Point: Loyal
Bad Point: Slovenly
Hobbies: Fixing old cars, hat collecting, pigging out

 

Overworked, overqualified, and underpaid, Katrina Kitty, better known around the office as Miss Kitty because she demands the respect, is technically the secretary at Lucky Rabbit Investigations but her skillset goes FAR beyond that role. Heck, far beyond her co-workers skills!

Always bored and put-upon by others, Kitty is just trying to get done with her day of work so she doesn’t have to deal with these clowns until tomorrow, no matter what the cost!

Likes: Not being at work, not dealing with fools, balls of string
Dislikes: Her co-workers
Favorite Drink: Catnip Julip
Goal in Life: Save up enough money to quit
Good Point: Extremely skilled
Bad Point: Cold as ice
Hobbies: Fine dining, sports that involve chasing things, toying with mice

One of 32 siblings in the Hare family, Curly is the only one of the bunch to follow her big brother Hardy to the big city of Inksburg. Perpetually cheerful and perpetually between jobs she can never keep for very long, it seems like Curly is the nicest, sweetest kid in the world. But if I were you I wouldn’t end up on her bad side. After all, it’s the quiet ones that are trouble, right?

She looks so sweet but on the other hand she’s been the main squeeze of known thief and reprobate Topsy Turtle for a while now. Just what is the deal with this little lady anyway?

Likes: Cute things, getting her way, her boy Topsy
Dislikes: Anyone and anything that stands in her way
Favorite Drink: Oh she’d never partake!
Goal in Life: That’s her business, not yours
Good Point: Sweet as a fresh baked pie on a windowsill
Bad Point: Hare-trigger
Hobbies: Picnics, job-hunting, loan sharking

Topsy is a con-man, through and through. Quick with his silver tongue and even quicker with a get-rich-quick scheme, he’s been at the bottom of the criminal food chain for long enough to know all the ins-and-outs of Inkburgs criminal element. That’s exactly why Hardy put the lean on him!

Forced into the service of Lucky Rabbit Investigations as a stool pigeon… err tortoise, Topsy takes every chance he can get to avoid Hardy but always ends up dishing the dirt when confronted because, lets face it, that Aesop guy was full of it; Tortoise vs. Hare only goes one way!

Likes: Tricking fools out of cash, poker, turtle wax
Dislikes: Hardy Hare, guys who are tougher than him
Favorite Drink: Shellzerac
Goal in Life: Become Big Boss of Inksburg!
Good Point: Well-connected
Bad Point: Push-over
Hobbies: Gambling, reading comics, pulling scams and dodging Hardy

Dr. Drake Duckless, aka “Doc” is many things, and one of them is probably licensed to be a doctor. Working out of an office in the same building as Lucky Rabbit Investigations, Doc gets called on any time something goes awry and requires medical attention – which is pretty often now that I think about it. Wow.

He might ask odd questions like “Where do you keep your heart at lately?” and “Would you mind signing this note waving all right to sue me?” but at the end of the day he’s got at LEAST a 68% survival rate with his surgeries and prices lower than some fast food joints, so it allll works out!

Likes: Discovering new organs, heavy machinery
Dislikes: Fancy medical schools, medical books
Favorite Drink: Quackeri
Goal in Life: Run a successful doctor’s office without going to jail for very long
Good Point: Boundless curiosity
Bad Point: Is a quack
Hobbies: Frankenstein-making, wine-tasting at work